Spiritual Growth and Intellect
DREAM: I was searching for an apartment. I saw an efficiency that I thought was nice and cozy and I said, this will do. Suddenly, I was in a big room, like a gymnasium. I saw a woman I know who considers herself an intellectual. She was wearing a gold and white striped dress, and she was posing like a model. I looked at the dress and thought it was really pretty and that I would like a dress like that. But then it was pointed out to me that the dress left the woman's midsection bare. I looked at the floor of this big room and saw a lot of black blobs attached to the floor. Next, I saw a man scraping up the black blobs. As he cleaned up the floor, a beautifully polished hardwood was revealed.
REFLECTION: From a young child, I was always so impressed how other people new so much and were so intelligent, because I never had such a great intellect, myself. Honestly, I didn't mind that I wasn't so smart (happy with my little efficiency apartment), but I did admire other people's intelligence. At times I did think it would be neat if I were smart, too (I would like a dress like that). After my extraordinary spiritual experiences began, I came to understand how intellect is not enough to bring you close to our Lord, and sometimes it is even a hindrance (the gold dress that left the midriff bare). A person must be willing to scrape away everything, even one’s own knowledge, understandings, ideas, and desires (the black blobs being scraped off the floor), if you want a foundation that is truly beautiful (like the beautiful wooden floor that was revealed).
DREAM: The same woman in the first dream was speaking to me, but her words were incomprehensible. The voice said: “She is speaking backwards.”
A Bible quote came to mind with this dream. Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart, on your own intelligence rely not; in all your ways be mindful of him, and he will make straight your paths.
REFLECTION: What comes to my mind are the Pharisees. Their intellect is their god. People who know all the rules, go to Church, use the sacraments, and are learned in the faith. They consider that they know the straight path, and if you do not do as they say, then you should be crushed.
The problem is that the Pharisees have hard hearts. They rely on their own rigid intellect. They speak backwards because they do not speak the language of our Lord’s loving gentleness and mercy.